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Wednesday 26 June 2013
Fashion Opinion

girl versus wardrobe

Emma Jones
No comments

I have this picture on my wall of fashion designer Katharine Hamnett meeting Margaret Thatcher in 1984. Hamnett, who had just been named designer of the year, was invited to Downing Street and, seizing the opportunity to make a statement, took off her coat to reveal the anti-missile message on her t-shirt. It’s often recognised…
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Monday 27 May 2013
Opinion

girl versus payday

Emma Jones
No comments

I get paid fortnightly. It’s not even one of those lucky arrangements where my salary and my student allowance fall on alternate fortnights, leaving me with a coincidental weekly income. One lump sum has to spread itself out over fourteen days and when your money-handling skills are as poor as mine things can get pretty…
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Monday 13 May 2013
Featured Opinion

girl versus one night stands

Emma Jones
5 comments

You wake up in the morning and you’re in someone else’s bed. You calculate that there is a 75% chance you will need to vomit within the next hour. You are not sure whether you want to roll over and see the face of the person spooning you and snoring so nonchalantly into the back…
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Monday 29 April 2013
Opinion

girl versus body

Emma Jones
One comment

Hey body, It’s time for us to talk about your little renovations. I know you’re 25 now, and you’re thinking about settling down, but I’ve got a bone to pick with you. You’re too big for all of my clothes. I guess we could call this “retaliation”. I put you through a pretty hectic summer….
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Monday 15 April 2013
Opinion

girl versus strip club

Emma Jones
2 comments

I am writing this with a very powerful hangover. My best friend is getting married in three weeks and last night we celebrated her love and commitment with plastic penis paraphernalia and tequila shots – because nothing symbolises love and commitment like plastic penis paraphernalia and tequila shots. As a traditional Hen’s night, the programme…
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Monday 1 April 2013
Featured

girl versus five-year plan

Emma Jones
5 comments

I have reached a fork in the road of my life. Unfortunately it is not a literal fork that I can plunge mercilessly into a huge bowl of pasta. It’s a metaphorical fork that forces me to make a choice. I am the worst at making choices, but funnily enough, this one’s easy. If I…
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Monday 18 March 2013
Culture Featured

girl versus unemployment

Emma Jones
One comment

Have you ever woken up at 1pm only to curse at your misfortune for having just missed Ellen? Looked up from page 229 of your Tumblr dashboard to marvel at Judge Judy’s limitless sass? Zoned out in front of Ready Steady Cook to think wistfully of the routine and order semester will bring when it…
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Monday 4 March 2013
Featured Opinion

girl versus period

Emma Jones
4 comments

Local supermarket, 8pm. I’m in tracksuit pants and no bra. The checkout operator smirks as he puts my items in a plastic bag. Two blocks of Caramello. Panadol. Tampons. The glint in his eye says: ‘I know about your unwelcome guest’. The answering glint in my eye says: ‘If you don’t wipe that grin off…
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Monday 18 February 2013
Culture Featured

girl versus dancefloor

Emma Jones
One comment

Think of the dancefloor like a savannah, and the dancers like a food chain. At the top of the food chain, comfortable in their territory, are the big cats: well-dressed misters and rhythm-hipped sisters. Around them, the hippos, zebras and elephants gather, watching enviously and applauding fanatically like at the end of Romy and Michelle’s…
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Monday 4 February 2013
Culture Featured

girl versus kitchen

Emma Jones
One comment

I don’t know if this is normal, but sometimes I wonder what David Attenborough would say about me if I were as alien and beautiful as the blue whale or the puma. Can’t you just hear his rich, erudite tones narrating my weeknights? ‘Here we see the young female lit student in her natural habitat:…
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