Working towards a good relationship with food
(image from BBC Good Food)
Like many other females, I have a sometimes fraught relationship with food. We’re taught that women should be “in the kitchen” and make awe-inspiring, delicious meals, but we’re not really “allowed” to eat these meals, because god forbid, we might get fat. We’re taught that food is only to be enjoyed sometimes, if it all.
Funnily enough, following this philosophy meant I barely ate, or when I did, it was whatever I could grab, regardless of whether it was “good” for me or not. I felt like a food rebel whenever I enjoyed what I was eating.
Ever since following Health At Every Size (HAES) and intuitive eating, I’ve found, I actually eat much MORE than I used to. The difference is, though, I enjoy what I’m eating. I savour it.
I’ve started a cooking program up with my younger sister. Because I care for her, I am often at home most of the day. So, I do the cooking. Before, it used to be the world’s most boring chore. I tried to work out what was healthy, what would make us put on less weight, lower our cholesterol and have very little fat. It was far too much of a hassle and most nights, I would end up just throwing something together, not taking any enjoyment in what I was doing.
Once I started this program with her, I started paying attention to what we were eating, and how I was preparing it. She loves to cook. She loves chopping, stirring, putting spices in, getting her hands dirty. She’s good at it. Watching her and the simple enjoyment of food, and preparing it for people, something clicked in me. I wanted that. I wanted to plan meals; I wanted to try cooking different things. And because I have the privilege of being at home, I can do these things.
I discuss with her what we feel like cooking, what we think will be good to make and what we feel like eating. We buy the ingredients and we get to it. I discovered cooking can be fun.
By following this philosophy, which mirrors very closely with intuitive eating, I’ve gotten myself out of that cooking rut, out of the “shoulds,” out of the expectation that because I am a woman, I should just cook the food and I don’t get to enjoy the food. It’s been enormously helpful in giving me a positive relationship towards food and eating.
