how the little mermaid destroyed my childhood

You know how there are moments in your childhood that you can pinpoint and go, ‘Well, that killed my innocence’? Reading this book is definitely in my top five. It’s probably even higher on the list than the time I was five and sat on my trampoline for four hours, waiting for Tenderheart to come and take me to live in Care-a-lot. He never came. Bastard.

Like most seven year olds, I had seen Disney’s The Little Mermaid countless times, and because Belle was two months away from entering the scene, Ariel was my favourite Princess. So when I saw the book advertised, I was excited. My parents – teachers – severely limited my time in front of the television. So this way, I could be lost in the world of Ariel, Eric and Flounder whenever I wanted! And then I realised that this book was ‘retold’ by someone named Freya Littledale. A book about Ariel written by someone with my name? I was sold!

Are you familiar with the real story of said book? It’s pretty damn far from the sugarplum-realm of Disney.

Firstly, I was a bit miffed that Ariel was not called Ariel and that she did not have red hair. There was also no Flounder or Sebastian! I was sad about Flounder, thrilled about the lack of Sebastian – I was always disappointed when the French Chef didn’t get to boil him.

Anyways, in this version Not-Ariel saves a Prince from drowning. She falls in love with him. And then the story I thought I knew so well completely changed.

Not-Ariel finds out that as a mermaid she does not have an immortal soul. The only way she would get one is if a human man is in loves her.

She does what every mermaid would do; she goes to the Sea-Witch and asks for legs. Not-Ursula tells her it will bring her sorrow, and that every step she takes will feel like she is walking on knives. She will also never be a mermaid again,  and if Not-Eric marries someone else then Not-Ariel will turn into sea-foam. Then comes the part we are familiar with; the Sea-Witch takes Not-Ariel’s voice, but instead of getting her to sing, she cuts out her tongue.

Not-Ariel, with her legs, then goes to see Not-Eric (whose family own slaves, so he must be a catch). Not-Eric grows to love Not-Ariel like a little sister, telling her that his heart is committed to the girl who saved his life. This is where the story gets complicated. Yes, Not-Ariel saved him from drowning. But in this version, there is an actual real girl who nursed Not-Eric back to health. Not Ursula in disguise, but a normal girl – a normal girl who turns out to be a Princess, and who is incredibly beautiful and sweet. They marry. Not-Ariel dances with Not-Eric at his wedding reception, and even though her heart is breaking and she’s never felt more pain in her legs in her life, she just wants to be close to him. My heart? Still breaking eighteen years later!

Not-Ariel’s sisters rise from the ocean’s surface to see her (oh, yes, despite a recently near drowning incident, the wedding is on a boat. As you do) and all of their beautiful hair has been crudely cut off. They have given it to the Not-Ursula in exchange for a deal to let Not-Ariel return to the water.

The deal? Not-Ariel has to kill the Not-Eric.

Not-Ariel goes into the Not-Eric’s bridal chamber. When she is in there, she hears him whisper the name of his bride in his sleep. She realises that he is truly in love, and since she truly loves him, she is unable to kill him. She instead throws herself into the water, so that she can turn into foam. Bet her sisters are pissed about their hair.

But instead of turning into foam, she feels herself rise into the air. She goes into a sort of purgatory or limbo for Mermaids, becoming ‘a daughter of the air’. Here, through good deeds, she can win herself an immortal soul. They work for three hundred years. But if a child cries? Every tear shed is a day added to their sentence.

Sorry, Not-Ariel, I think I may have added another twenty years to your sentence that day alone.

In all honesty though, this is why the story is so upsetting as a child, and still resonates with you as an adult:

Unrequited love. Not-Ariel loved Not-Eric so much, she put his happiness before his own. There was nothing wrong, or awful, or villainous about the girl he married. And yes, it would be fantastic if we could hate all the current-girlfriends of boys we used to date – or want to date – but we can’t always. Life doesn’t have clearly defined clear-cut villains and heroes. The sweet girl doesn’t always get the guy, because there’s another sweet girl around the corner. We can’t always get what we want, and we can’t always have a talking fish as a best friend, and sometimes we put ourselves through a tremendous amount of pain fighting for something – or someone – that is not truly ours.

To quote from one of my favourite movies, The Princess Bride, (that thankfully has a novel version pretty much identical to it):

Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something.

And, at least, we still have Beauty and the Beast.

(Image Credits 1)