period pieces: period stand up at melbourne fringe? oh, but she did

This is the final instalment of Period Pieces, upcoming Melbourne Fringe Festival comedian Loani Arman’s hilarious series on menstruation. You can look back over her pieces here.

 

When I tell people I’m doing a stand up show called “PERIOD” for Melbourne Fringe, I’m usually met with a whole minute’s silence. There has been surprise, shock, curiosity, and disgust. Sure, I could fill that silence with awkward banter about the weather, the inflation of corner store lolly bags or funny cat videos, but instead I fill that silence by overcompensating for my comedy choices. I say the word “period” as many times as possible.

Period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period, period.

It’s my hope that by the end of my period chant, the deer in headlights before me will be so accustomed to hearing the word “period”, that we’ll be syncing by the end of our conversation.

So, why do a stand up show about periods? Why not? I’ve seen stand up shows about camping, assassins, babies, and toothpaste. Surely, periods need some stage time?

The timing seems perfect. The UK Independent recently reported that the tampon tax debate had seen a resurgence of the period joke and that periods were one of the hottest trends at this year’s Edinburgh Fringe. It’s official: periods have become trendy and men and women all over the world are starting to defend their right to bring this bodily function into the public sphere.

The Twitter hashtag #livetweetyourperiod saw thousands of women tweeting about their periods. Try it. I did. It’s fun:

When you first stand up in the morning #livetweetyourperiod

Don’t think I won’t kill you and eat you #livetweetyourperiod

Scared to sneeze #livetweetyourperiod

Do vampires get their periods #livetweetyourperiod

Artist Rupi Kaur posted a portrait of herself in her pyjamas which were stained with blood and took on Instagram when it blocked the photo. Kiran Gandhi ran the London Marathon “free bleeding”.

And in a moment of menstruation unity, men and women united to tweet Donald Trump over his hideous accusation that a Fox news anchor was ‘bleeding out of her whatever’.

Out of her ‘whatever’ Trump??? I’d hate to hear you try your hand at dirty talk:
I want to have ‘you know’ with your ‘whatever’.

Your whatever is making me feel ‘ho hum’.

Is that my comb-over in your ‘whatever’ or are you just happy to see me?

Eww. Just… ewwwww!

There are so many ways to talk about menstruation that doesn’t involve a man with a comb-over, so come to the show. There’s so much period fun to be had. (And with Curtis Stone, Powerade, fans, sanitary products, and cake.)

 

Fresh from Sydney Comedy Festival and two years of sold out Sydney Fringe shows, Loani Arman brings her hilarious new show “PERIOD” to Melbourne Fringe Sept 26 – Oct 4, The Courthouse Hotel, North Melbourne. The show is supported by Tsuno and directed by Emma Dockery. Tickets are selling fast, so be sure to book to catch one of Lip’s funniest guest writers.