real men: a (satirical) exploration of masculinity
To say that much has been written about the place and condition of masculinity in today’s world would be an understatement. It’s certainly a favorite topic of many. For as long as I can remember discussions over the role played by men in society and the new challenges and expectations they face have been a recurring theme in editorials, magazines, talk radio and the larger public sphere in general. Much of the discussion often centers on the ways in which being a “real man” is being or has been altered, and upon reflection, this anxiety is somewhat understandable. “Man”, as traditionally conceived (think: in-control, uncompromising, practical in the extreme and overwhelmingly heterosexual), is these days in full retreat. In recent years we have witnessed trends such as the dramatic rise in cosmetic surgery for males and (even more amazingly) the mainstreaming and widespread social acceptance of heavily asymmetrical male haircuts. It is increasingly the case that a preference for pushbikes over V8s, an active interest in fashion and even staying at home with the kids while mum works are not incompatible with being a full-blooded contemporary man. Indeed, even our cinematic male role models have changed, with the thoughtful, awkward nerd type (ala Michael Cera/Jessie Eisenberg) often edging out the more traditional devil-may-care and confident troublemakers of yore. Even that eternal bastion of absolute and total manhood, the US military, has finally repealed the policy of “don’t ask, don’t tell” and now (in theory at least) allows openly gay men and women to serve.
When seen in isolation, these changes may not appear overly dramatic. After all, fashions have always changed over time and so too have popular role models; many experts in the field of gender studies will tell you that a perpetual “crisis of masculinity” has always been a feature of the gendered landscape. However when appreciated as a whole I do feel that these changes may indeed be heralding a new era in terms of exactly what it means to be a “real man”. Although I would like to stress emphatically that the category of “real man” is always a poorly defined one and to some degree intentionally hazy (a man’s man in London may not be seen in quite the same light in Texas or Khartoum) I do nevertheless think there is merit in referring to a vague, overarching popular masculinity (at least, in English-speaking, relatively affluent Western countries).
Firstly, and perhaps most importantly, there is an entrenched awareness among males (not just those lounging in the university campus café but males in general) about the existence of tired and embarrassingly-dated masculine stereotypes. An example of this can be found in the familiar Friday night picture of large, tattooed men out drinking beer, and perhaps playing pool, all the while wearing tight fitting and brightly colored shirts, possibly even pink or purple. Through the public wearing of a colour traditionally the reserve purely of women an otherwise completely macho-man can in some small way easily, and loudly, declare his awareness of traditional masculine stereotypes and his (if only token) rejection of them. This example may be confusing, but this desire on the part of males to no longer be seen as explicitly cultivating a traditionally masculine image is a crucial part of the transformation of “real men” that is taking place.
Some have of course argued these changes herald the emergence of a new kind of 21st century fop. An interest in fashion and personal care, it is argued, combined with a decline in traditional masculine values, will result in tomorrow’s males being little more than self-obsessed dandies, more preoccupied with their image than say, oh, procreating and waging distant wars overseas. But these arguments are stupid. Even a simple look at the real motivations behind the recent changes in what it means to be a (mainstream and overtly heterosexual) man actually paints quite a nice picture of the future. Why exactly do today’s fiercely heterosexual men now blow-dry their hair and squeeze into a pair of skin-tight jeans? To seek the approval of today’s ever-more-discerning women, duh. It sounds too simple to be true, but to be seen as appealing by females explains basically all of the drastic changes to masculinity that have taken place. Now that men on average are to some degree aware that masculinity is more or less a bad cliché from the past, only one criteria remains by which men may really be judged against one another: appeal. What we may be witnessing is a move away from an abstract popular masculinity grounded around ideas like recklessness, courage, physical prowess and contempt for grooming to one instead based largely on a man’s ability to earn the approval of women. In this new world it is not too much of a stretch to imagine that over time even heterosexuality might be removed from the common criteria required to be considered properly ‘macho’. In the not-too-distant future it is possible that we may live in an era where coveted mainstream macho status is accorded to those most seen as desirable or admirable and not to the greatest brawler or athlete. This may well be a hopelessly optimistic interpretation of what in reality might be nothing more than a series of temporary male fashion trends, but a man can dream.
By Paul Ferlitsch
